The Muskoxen

Today's hangover capped off a three-week (and counting!) cycle of liquor related hangovers that have led me to the conclusion that I just can't drink liquor anymore. I don't know if I'm getting old or if I'm out of practice or if I'm metabolizing the alcohol slower because I quit smoking... point it, it's going to take a concerted effort on my part to get back off the wagon on this.

Mint juleps in celebration of the Kentucky Derby were the culprit this time. Last week it was a mixture of liquors that left me feeling shaky until the early part of the afternoon. The week before that it was several double shots of Jack that made me barf up my breakfast the next day, and left me out of commission until 8 o'clock that evening.

Now, I understand that some people would ask the obvious question, "Why not just avoid liquor?" The answer to that is another question. "Have you ever seen 'Raiders of the Lost Ark?' Remember when that lady out drinks that big Nepalese guy (who for some reason was white)? What would've happened if she had lost and passed out? The Nazis would have walked in, got that medallion, found the Ark, and taken over the world. Do you want Nazis to take over the world? No? Then I need to be able to drink liquor." And, to answer another obvious question, no I don't have any artifacts that would point me towards any priceless, religious relics, but what if I get one and the drinking contest happens that same night? See where I'm going with this?

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